I've gotten quite busy and lazy these days, school's homeworks and study stuffs. Long time I didn't update my blog already, but who cares anyway? All those thoughts and experiences I've always wanted to write down has gone, or forgotten to be precise. Kinda regret for being lazy though.
Ever since my birthday has passed, I'm officially 18! And, I've decided to take Form 6 as my further studies. I've gained new perspective of people and things since I've started working. I came to realize that my interpersonal skills sucks, but hey, I'm an introvert! I'm usually quite shy, but trying to hide it. Sometimes I can't stand people who make joke of people, especially myself, but then I've learnt that play along with their joke might be the best thing to do to avoid further embarrsasment. Anyway, that's part of interpersonal thingy.
Another thing is, I felt most people keep quiet around me. Are they don't like me? Or have I done something wrong? I dunno, maybe I sucks at conversing with people, and they felt that they have nothing to say to me. But when they're around my friends, they are talking and laughing. I started to feel jealous and envy. I felt dumb... But what to do?
Studies, particularly science subjects, need time to understand and memorize. But then in CLHS, our fellow classmates are very indomitable, in the way that they don't want to lose. I felt very pressured that, why they are so quick and smart, even though that they did not pay attention in class... Maybe I'm "kia su" also...
Anyway, the invisible crushing force I'm talking about is pressure. I'm very pressured lately, mostly from studies, and relationships, especailly jealousy and envy, some pressure are without a reason... I hope someone would help me overcome jealousy and envy...
Anyhow, I like to write a lot, and probably no one would want to read it anyway. But in conclusion, I started to felt pressured lately, and my interpersonal skills still very amateurish, which brings more stress. In the end, I'm the one who is responsible for myself, and the stress are created by myself, only me alone can solve it right?
Ps: Cheers! Hope you guys don't stressed yourself out like I do...
